FINNEY’S 5: Dumb things people keep repeating

Some of those old sayings don't make sense — or cents.

Image generated by ChatGPT based from prompts written by the author.

1. “A penny saved is a penny earned.”
   That means you’ll still have to get a loan to give your two cents’ worth.

2. “You can’t have your cake and eat it, too.”
   But you can. You absolutely can. And you should.

3. “The early bird catches the worm.”
   Sleep in. Get an Egg McMuffin instead.

4. “Don’t cut off your nose to spite your face.”
   Better to go with Botox.

5. “Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater.”
   This was once a problem common enough to need a warning?

---

FINNEY’S 5 is an occasional humor column by exiled newspaperman Daniel P. Finney that is not meant to be taken seriously. If you did, stop it. Sine sale, gravis nimis.