Harpy Birthday!
HPV!
Happy Birthing!
Happy Bird Day!
Sappy Birthday!
Finney’s 5 is an occasional humor column exclusive to paid subscribers of the Paragraph Stacker. It is not meant to be taken seriously, so if you did, knock it off. Laugh a little. It saves on the Pepto-Bismol costs.
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I am sure I have done a couple of these!